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Sunday, September 1, 2013

Random What If...

Today's random what-if is brought to you by insomnia.
What if you were the suspect of a murder or other horrific crime? Innocent mind you of whatever you've been accused of. When the news crews swarm people you know, love, or just see on the street, what will they say about you? What will be the words plastered all over the six oclock news that will come to define who you are in the public eye and play a role in your trial?
Let's analyze my darling husband first, I've heard all of these about him before.
 Dependable. Hard-Worker. Nice Guy. Funny.
I think he's got a fair shake. More than likely someone will say 'I just don't believe it,' and really really mean it.
Ok my turn. Again I'll use words that I've actually heard before in reference to me.
Quiet. Loner. Socially Awkward. Intimidating. Weird. Freakishly Intelligent(yes someone has actually used that phrase but then again she was a bubblegum blowing, hair twirling, clueless kinda girl so there may not be much to it.)
Oh shit. I'm screwed. I'm really really screwed. The kids I went to highschool will say, "well there was always something a little off about her." And the reporters will probably stop there not bothering to dig deeper to discover that I have panic attacks related to social anxiety, have volunteered at several charity functions, and cried all day long the one time I hit a dog in the road. (There was ice and snow on the road, I hit my brakes, they started to lock, I slid towards the ditch, and I knew I no longer had a choice and let off the brakes to bring the car under control. Still bothers me.) They won't search out my few friends who'll tell them how protective I am of anyone in trouble, that I'm a good listener, or as the lady at the gym put it last week that I'm inspirational.In short pretty well incapable of being the perp. Because the face the world sees is completely different than the true face. I've worked really hard to change that in the eight years since highschool and my first job, and to an extent I've been successful on some levels but it's been an uphill battle. I now have a business 'switch' which for the few hours I'm in front of a client makes me the friendly smiley happy person I want to be. The second they're gone though I'm curled up in a ball trying to recharge or shaking out the nerves from my hands.
I'm not being over-dramatic. For kicks I postulated this scenario to my husband the other night. He immediately said, "Yeah, I've worried about that before." Great. Even you think I wouldn't have a snowball's chance.
To end this random what if post...
What would the world say about you? Would they be right on target or nowhere near the truth? Would you have a snowball's chance?

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