I love my kitty but...

...Seriously this morning I could have killed her.


She looks sweet and innocent but don't be fooled, she's plotting her nefarious deeds as we speak.

Picture this it's a little after 6am. I wake up for work after hitting the alarm clock a few times and drag myself into the laundry room to get my clothes out of the dryer. Before I ever begin I feed the cats. I know they're hungry. They flood in and get to eating. I start pulling clothes out the dryer. I get about halfway through when suddenly out of the blue Claire goes absolutely freaking spastic. You know how when cats get surprised on hardwood floors their little legs just go everywhere as they try to take off. You know that scrabbling sound as the claws dig into the floor. Okay imagine that on my bad f-ing foot. The pain was pretty intense, more so than it probably should have been. And that early in the morning as soon as I looked down and saw all the blood I started bawling. Just out right huge crocodile tears as I pitifully and somewhat stupidly ask her why why would she hurt me like that. As if she's going to open that fuzzy little mouth and go, 'Well Cindal it's like this..." After I calmed down enough to stop sobbing I got angry. She knew it. She went into the bedroom and hopped up next to DH and started purring, "Look at me I'm cute, I'm innocent, see?" Uh-uh wasn't buying it. So Dh got awakened by Claire getting a rump swat by a crazy crying lady in the wee hours of the morn. After that Claire gave up on the innocent act and did what she should have done in the first place, hide. I cleaned the gouges, put ointment on them, but couldn't get them to stop bleeding before I had to put on my shoe and go to work. Ouch, ouch, ouch.
She would of course pick three days before I'm supposed to go to the foot doctor to do this. It's like she freaking knows. It's my wedding day all over again in that aspect. To make sense of that here's a short flashback.
 2 Days before my wedding. Playing video games trying not to stress, Claire's asleep on my chest. She wakes up and decides to move to the bed, but instead of hopping down and hopping back up she takes the short cut. Up my chest and over my shoulder. Her foot slips and cuts a 7 inch long slice from my collarbone into my cleavage. My wedding dress had a corset top. I managed to mostly cover it up with makeup but it stung like a mother since it hadn't completely scabbed over by the day. I wasn't that mad then. I knew it was an accident. This morning...there was no rhyme or reason for behavior, no excuse.
So now I'm sure the foot doctor is going to be concentrating on my 'mauling' instead of what actually needs attention and I'll have to explain what happened and get lectured on the proper way to take care of a wound blah blah blah. As if this situation wasn't difficult enough. As if I didn't have enough foot pain. Stupid Cat.

Check it, the damage as of this evening. Small cut on my big toe. Puncture in the middle upper area. Three very long cat gouges from the center to the edge, the middle one is pretty darn deep. On the up side just a little bit of bruising left on the outside of the big toe, and on the knot(which rebruised on friday thanks to a 14 hr shift)